


Something Clever

by Nefertiti_Osiris



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Akward boners, Bruises, Coran Coran The Gorgeous Man, First Kisses, I regret all, Jealous Lance (Voltron), Kisses, Langst, Lol naw, Looove in the time of voltron, M/M, Much langst, Oblivious Shiro (Voltron), Smoochies, boo boos, ouchies, pidge Knows all
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-04-11
Updated: 2017-06-24
Packaged: 2018-10-17 13:04:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,606
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10594602
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nefertiti_Osiris/pseuds/Nefertiti_Osiris
Summary: What makes Keith so special, huh? Lance could barely stand the guy, but noooo. It was hard enough being in love with your commanding officer as it was, but now things were a whole lot harder thanks to him. What's a poor palladin to do? Hiding feelings  for Shiro was hard enough before Keith started to snoop around.





	1. Pen caps and Kalteneckers

Lance was frustrated. in every sense of the word, sexually, physically, emotionally. Even his ears were frustrated with the bullshit he'd been enduring all day at the hands of his ( frustrating!!!) team.  
And what was most frustrating was that it was all his fault. It had started off well, you see. Lance had been zoning out during an "important" tactical meeting (which, in his ever humble opinion, were rarely important at all) staring all Shiro's beautiful face. What? It was beautiful, and Damn lance wanted to be the pen cap that dangled from Shiro's mouth. Maybe if he died on a mission an benevolent good would remake him as such? He would be blessed indeed.  
HOWEVER. a not so kind or gentle nudge from Pidge snapped him out of his revery. As he jolted to attention, lance realized all eyes were on him.  
"Haha...What did I miss?"  
Allura's answering scowl was almost enough to make him regret not paying attention. Almost.  
"Well, if your done staring at Shiro, some of us would like to continue. "  
Fuck. Lance felt like his cheeks would melt from all the heat concentrated there.  
" uh um uh sure!"  
He laughed awkwardly, finally noticing Keith's glare, how Shiro avoided eye contact, hunks sympathetic smile, and Pidge's smug grin.  
He needed to do damage control, and fast.  
" just lost in thought about the stars in your eyes, princess."  
Finger guns completed the look.  
The answering groan from around the table made lance's stomach unclench with relief. It was better to be seen as an airhead and flirt, than as the pathetic cadet in love with his commanding officer.  
Lance wasn't sure what the rules were about fraternisation in space, but on earth... He was well aware of the consequences of misplaced affection.  
His affections could put Shiro's rank at risk, could put his position as a Palladian in jeopardy. Shiro couldn't play favourites, and Lance sure as hell wasn't going to ask him to start now.  
So he laughed, and tried to actively listen when Allura started speaking again.

 

*******

As soon as the meeting was over, Lance took off. He didn't want any more questions about his odd behavior, and from the smugly satisfied eyebrow wiggle Pidge had shot him as he left, he hadn't been as good at deflection as he'd assumed. Lance had a feeling she'd be cornering him sometime in the near future, somehow aware of every thought he seemed to have? Lance suspected she was a telepath. Hey, one could never be too careful these days. Space was a funky place. He wouldn't be surprised if she'd somehow mutated to be even more of a menace.

God, Lance wanted to be alone. It was getting harder and harder to hide his growing feelings for their leader. Forming Voltron required a certain amount of mental vulnerability, and it was easy to overshare information during a mind meld.  
Lance was sure to keep that part of himself hidden, even if it made him a little more isolated. Shiro was just so Good. Kind, smart, moral, a great leader, a great man, and an even greater palladin.  
Lance was nothing in comparison. But that didn't stop lance from pining.

His feet carried him around a corner to a spot he was intimately familiar with... Kaltenecker's stable. Lance thanked whatever deity up there that the rest of the crew had forgotten about the space cow. He told Kaltenecker everything. This, laying in the space hay with a sympathetic space cow, made everything a little easier to handle. At least Kaltenecker couldn't tattle on him.  
Lance got comfortable.  
" oh my quiznack, Kaltenecker, my dude, my bud. Can you tell me why Shiro is so quiznacking gorgeous? Because I'd like an apology from whoever created that piece of art, ya' know? His stupid face and full lips and big bara hands are SO DISTRACTING."  
Kaltenecker chewed his space curd encouragingly.  
"... and his VOICE!!! It's like the very essence of sex lives in his voice box to haunt my dreams! It's not like he'll ever know that I love him, Kaltenecker, chill. I'm not gonna tell him! How stupid do you think I am? Ohh just chew your space goo, space cow. We both know I'd never have a chance."

Just as he closed his mouth ( for the first time since he'd arrived) he heard a throat clear behind him.  
He'd thought he was safe!!! ALONE!!! Who dared trespass on his space cow therapy?! And more importantly, how long had they been there? Lance didn't even want to turn around. He knew that voice.  
"Keith. What. The. Fuck."  
"Lance..."  
Lance turned around slowly. Keith looked shocked, and angry.  
" What? What are you going to tell me that I don't already know?"  
" You should tell him."-  
Lance honestly was wondering if Keith had gotten hit too hard on the head during their last mission.  
"Mullet, I don't know what kind of brain damage your shitty hair has caused you, but that was the worst idea I've heard since I've left earth."  
Keith, if anything, looked even more frustrated.  
" Well, cargo pilot, your stupid pining it's making life difficult for the rest of us. Get your head out of your ass, confess and get over it! "  
Wow. Just wow.  
Lance just gaped at Keith.  
" how dumb are you? I can't tell him! Do you know what kind of position that would put  
Shiro in?? He'd feel obligated to turn me down kindly, and he would constantly be trying to not hurt my feelings about it and, and...!!!  
You know what you snooped around where you weren't wanted and now you can keep your mouth shut! This has nothing to do with you!"  
Keith just scowled in response.

"Either you tell him or I will."


	2. whoever said "don't hate, celebrate",was a fucking idiot

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lance gets pinned. The trope continues.

If Lance, hypothetically, of course, murdered Keith by shoving him out the airlock would he be tried for murder in space? 

Hypothetically. 

Because Lance felt about two point five milliseconds away from frog marching that nosy, invasive little shit over to it and "accidentally" pushing him through. Ohhh noooo... What tragedy!!! Much accident! 

Then he wouldn't have to deal with dodging Keith all the time. As soon as Lance had stalked away from his not so safe safe haven, Keith had followed him around like a puppy. It had been a week since then, and Keith had done everything from accost lance in the shower, telling Lance that " obviously he wasn't brave enough to tell",To the current, frustrating situation. 

Pidge was also going in the airlock. They were both sitting in his room as he came back from cleaning his baby Blue, a shit eating smile gracing Pidge's gremlins esque features, a typical scowl on Keith's.  Lance had been fairly relaxed on his trek back, a vision of his favourite face mask dancing in his head. But as soon as the door slid open, Lance knew he was in for a tough night. 

"SO." Pidge said evilly, " Keithy-boy over here had some interesting news for the on board shance shippers today." 

Maybe the airlock was too kind a death. 

Lance felt an icy fury burn within him. 

" WHAT THE FUCK. " 

Keith withered a little bit. 

" I don't care what quiznacking "intervention" you two have planned, but you can stop it now. My life is not a soap opera! This, this," Lance ground the heels of his hands against his eyes," is the most inconsiderate thing you've ever done to me. Do you think I WOULDN'T LOVE to tell Shiro I love him? That I think about him all the time? To smother him in love and affection? Because I would!" 

Pidge's smile had disappeared, her face turning pale a she stared at Lance in the open doorway.

"...DO YOU UNDERSTAND WHY I CAN'T TELL HIM?? Because he's my COMMANDING OFFICER!!! I can't put the REST of you at a disadvantage because I'd have his favor. Do you even understand that he doesn't feel the same? Do you understand how this constant needling makes me feel? I am so done with both of you. GET. OUT." 

"No." 

Yeah, the airlock was definitely too kind a death. 

Pidge glared at him over her glasses. 

"I never took you for a coward, Lance McClain. Don't give me that," she flailed her hands wildly,"superior officer bullshit. You are afraid he doesn't like you, so you are making up excuses. But you know what? I'm so fucking sick of you two pining. I just want Shiro to be happy, and fuck you Lance for not giving him the benefit of the doubt. Now." She stood and lanced Lance with a glare," you have a month. If you don't tell, we interfere. It's unfair, but your little inner turmoil is effecting everyone. With that, I exunt" 

She swept dramatically out of the room, head held high

Keith followed behind her. 

"Lance?"

Lance considered punching him, but just sighed instead. 

"What, Keith." 

Keith's smile was wicked. 

" I'm going to do everything in my power to make one of you confess in the next month. I'm sick of this ninny bullshit. Both of you need to get off the self pity train. It's annoying as fuck." 

"As poetic as ever, Mullet" 

" Damn right." 

 ****

Lance didn't sleep well that night. When the breakfast alarm sounded, Lance considered feigning sick to get out of whatever hellish torture was planned for the day. 

Only the memory of the Great Nunvill Incident kept him from doing so. Groaning halfheartedly, he crawled out of bed, blindly pulling his jeans and a random, rather large t shirt on, and headed to the kitchen. 

Everyone was at the table by the time he arrived, chowing on the green goo that constituted for a bland daily fare. He yawned. 

" morning, guys" 

They all turned to look at him, and Shiro chocked on his goo. 

"Is... is that..?"

Lance was confused. 

"Is that what?" 

Was there something on his face? Had he broken out? Why was only Shiro freakin- 

" Is that my shirt?" 

Oh. 

Oh no.

And from the smug look on Keith's face, Lance was pretty sure he knew who the culprit was. 

" um! I wasn't looking when I put it on! I can change!!! I'll just go do that!!" 

Lance had started edging towards the door when Shiro stopped him.

" um, it's fine, we, uh," he cleared his throat," have a busy day so there's really no time to change. Just wear it for today." 

What had Lance done to deserve this torture? Now that it was pointed out to him, he could feel the collars edge slipping off his shoulder, the excess fabric on either side. The fact that it was black, and on any other day Keith's little trick wouldn't have worked. 

"Yeah, I guess I'll just do that then?" 

Pidge snorted, and the look Lance shot her could've killed. 

He ate his breakfast in silence. 

*******

Training. Wasn't training just a god damn joy? 

Keith, it seemed, was on a mission. The universe had a healthy vendetta against Lance, it seemed. Today's hand to hand combat drills were going just fucking peachy before Keith had opened his mouth.

"Hey, Shiro!" 

The man in question jogged over to where lance and Keith were fighting. 

"Yeah, Keith? What's the issue?"

Keith's scowl never changed but his eyes sparkled with what Lance assumed to be malice. 

" Well, Lance here was expressing an interest in grappling, but I don't want to. Could you help so I can do something productive? I'm sick of this easy shit." 

Shiro looked disapprovingly at Keith. 

"Language, Keith." His eyes lit up, however, as he turned to Lance. "I'd love to teach you! Grappling is an important skill to learn in close combat! Thanks for taking the initiative, Lance! I'm proud of you."

What could lance say to that? Shiro was so striking, so happy at Lance that all the poor boy could do was follow along numbly. 

Close, horizontal quarters with Shiro. 

Shiro's hands all over him. 

Lance was going to throw HIMSELF in the airlock. 

When they got to the mat, Shiro looked over at Lance, and said smiling, " just do the best you can on the first round I want to gauge your skill set first. 

Lance barely had time to nod before Shiro was coming at him like a bullet. Letting out a rather high pitched yelp he would fully deny later, he tried to dodge.

Operative word being 'tried'.

 In about five seconds flat, Shiro had him pinned down on his stomach, one hand holding both his wrists above his head, the other on Lance's hip holding him still. Shiro loomed over Lance's sprawled body. 

Inconveniently, every fantasy lance had ever had of Shiro holding him down came rushing to the forefront of his brain. 

_ Shiro above him, moaning," Lance" into his ear  _

_ Shiro sinking so far into him, lance thought it would spit him in two.  _

_Cum dripping out of his abused backside as Shiro prepared to go agai_ n

Fuck. Lance felt his lower stomach start to burn as Shiro flipped him over to demonstrate a new hold. 

NO no NO no no no no

Lance was NOT popping a boner when Shiro thigh was now literally pressed against him. Lance started to struggle furiously in Shiro's grip, pulling away in a panic.

Well, he attempted to pull away.

Shiro just frowned at him from above. 

"Are you okay? Because you'll have to try harder than that to get out of this hold.." 

And went on to explain the grip and how to escape it. 

Lance's dick was RAPIDLY hardening, and his time was running out. 

"SHIRO!!!" He sqeaked out, interrupting Shiro's lecture " I have to pee!! Like real bad. My buddy, my dude, you gotta let me up. " 

Shiro looked a bit put out. 

"You have to go right now? "

Lance nodded frantically as Shiro eyed him skeptically. 

" that wouldn't work in a real fight, you know."

Lance nodded even faster, and Shiro reluctantly climbed off. 

" You have ten minutes." 

And Lance took off faster than he'd ever had before, all the while trying to hide a raging hard on from his captain's all too observant eyes. 

He was pretty sure he could rub this one out in less than ten. After all, it wouldn't do to have Shiro come looking for him. 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yo feel free to hit me up with any ideas or suggestions!


	3. something lost, something gained

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shiro pov! Haha I love my pining boys. They make me happy.

SHIRO

Quiznak, lance was staring at him. Or, more accurately, at his mouth.

And every second he did made Shiro's face heat up a fraction more. Was it the pen cap? Did Lance maybe think that was weird?? It was an odd habit he'd picked up at the garrison, one that usually helped him focus.  
Apparently he couldn't say the same about Lance.  
What was worse was that everyone had noticed. Oh god, was it that easy to tell that Shiro was both flattered and flustered? Should he say something?  
Thankfully, Allura did it for him, and Lance threw out some cheesy line that made Shiro hurt a little inside  
Of course Lance wasn't staring at him. Who would want a man with a torn face and more baggage than his prosthetic could carry?  
No one, and certainly not Lance.

Lance was beautiful, unscarred. Normal. 

Shiro was not. 

\- - - - - - - -

He almost followed lance out of the meeting; the boy had been so uncharacteristically quite Shiro was a little worried. Somehow, though, Lance seemed to have evaded him. He couldn't help thinking of Lance's eyes on his mouth during the meeting as he wandered the halls listless. God, Shiro felt like a hormonal teenager. Lance looked at his lips once, and BAM! Shiro was having fantasies of shoving him against the wall and kissing him until that cocky attitude was gone. 

When Lance was genuine...well, Shiro could safely say that nothing in the world was better. The purity, the sweetness he conveyed so easily made Shiro have to clutch his chest and turn away. 

The last time it had happened, Pidge had smirked and called him a "fangirl". 

What did that have to do with his abnormal heart palpitations? He figured he'd ask her another day. 

 

To be fair, Shiro wasn't dumb. He was perfectly aware of the hero worship thing lance had going for him. The only thing holding Shiro back from the lusty wall make out was the phrase "hero worship". 

"Hero worship" and "relationship" weren't things that went hand in hand. Once lance saw his flaws, would lance leave? Would Sirius sometimes delicate mental state drive him away? 

Shiro had spent quite a few late nights agonizing over it. 

\------  

Something was off between Keith and lance. Keith seemed awfully smug, and Lance awfully defensive. So when they seemed to be working together during combat practice, Shiro was ecstatic. Finally, the two must volatile palladins were getting along! 

He was even happier when lance showed an interest in wrestling. The poor boy seemed a little embarrassed to ask for help, but he had no cause to fear! Shiro would be sure to teach him everything he could. 

But the lesson had just started, and Lance had run off.

Shiro sighed, and pushed himself off the mat. He wasn't going to let lance escape that easily. He don't believe for one second that lance had to pee that badly. Sighing even more dramatically, he went on the prowl. He had a run away palladin to find. 

 

\----

 

 

Where was lance? He'd checked everywhere: Lance's room, the bridge, every closet, the main room, the kitchen, the pantry, and Lance was no where to be found. Maybe lance HAD been telling the truth. Shiro almost felt bad for doubting him... but this exact situation had occurred before. He heard for the bathroom, just to check, but stopped shocked with his hand on the button. Lance was...moaning??

His name???

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AAAAHHHHH I HAD TO CHANGE THE RATING


	4. kiss me on the mouth, but please don't bite

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things almost come to a head but they don't.

Lance knew that Shiro was avoiding him.  
After his little, uh, management issue he'd come back to the training deck in hopes of at least getting in some one on one time with Shiro, but lo and behold, the man was no where to be found.  
For someone who rigidly upheld the rules, Shiro seemed to break them a lot.  
Lance pouted. He would deny it if anyone (read: Keith) pointed it out, but he could feel the infamous McClain pout making it's appearance.  
Plopping down on the floor of the training deck, he glared at Keith's head. It was all Keith's fault. If that quiznacking quiznak hadn't been a meddlesome idiot than lance wouldn't be in this frustrating position. Just as his bottom lip began to quiver, the door he was leaning on slid open and Shiro toppled over him. It was...not the most graceful thing lance had ever seen Shiro do, and he couldn't stop the giggles that poured from him at the shocked look on Shiro's face.  
"Hahaha! You-your FACE!!!"  
Shiro just stared at the laughing boy in front of him.  
Lance felt his heart melt into food goo as Shiro chuckled once. Oh zarkon this dude was going to be the death of him. Shakily standing up, lance offered a hand down to the man on the floor.  
"Come on. Big guy, let's train."  
\-------------

Foolishly, maybe, lance had thought that everything was good. Between him and Shiro, that is. Pidge was still giving him COMPLETELY unsubtle smirks, and Keith had just menacingly sharpened his knife in front of Lance's room that night. So, you know, everything was normal.

Except it seemed that Shiro couldn't stand to be a five foot radius of him. Now, it wasn't like Shiro was a very tactile person to begin with. With the ptsd he'd acquired during his imprisonment, he wasn't too touchy. It was understandable; Lance always asked before he touched Shiro in consideration to this. But now, contact was nonexistent. Sure Shiro would ruffle Pidge's hair after a mission, or hug Keith, but he never would touch lance. His hand would hover in the air above Lance's shoulder awkwardly before Shiro would just clear his throat and walk away.  
Lance was so frustrated, he could pull Keith's hair out.  
He's done that once, when Shiro was missing and Keith was black palladin. On particularly bad days he'd relive the incident in his mind and it would automatically make him feel better.  
So. It'd been almost two weeks of Shiro being as awkward as a kid caught with their brothers porn stache before lance decided he'd had enough. He was going to confront the gorgeous man if it was the last thing he did.  
\----- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

After an unusually quiet dinner of oh SO delicious food goo, he stalked to Shiro's bedroom door, all his beauty supplies in hand. Maybe Shiro would be able to discuss whatever issue he had with Lance if it was accompanied by a delicious smelling face mask. Scowling he knocked on Shiro's door. Lance almost felt bad even he saw the shocked expression in the black palladins face, but he soldiered on.  
"Shiro! " he started confidently enough. "You and I need to chat. So I brought facemasks and nail polish." Stepping past a flabbergasted Shiro into the room, he put his basket down, and his hands on his hips.  
"You and me, mister, are going to have a spa day."  
The black palladin hadn't moved from his role as gaping doorway gargoyle. Lance raised an eyebrow imperiously. "Well? Are you done doing the Quasimodo impression yet or....?"  
Abruptly, Shiro snapped his mouth shut, blushed deeply, and straightened up. He could only wordlessly nod at Lance, before he stepped towards the middle of the room and let the door sweep shut behind him.

**Author's Note:**

> This is my virgin run on ao3. I'm finally writing instead of passive aggressively hoping other people write the stories I'd like to read.


End file.
